Hi all

We may have appeared to be a bit quiet of late, but there’s been a lot going on behind the scenes as we seek to replace the recently departed members

Well, we went over to the second audition yesterday and found a brilliant cafe in Lenzie while we were waiting for Biscuit. Beautiful toasties – and the salad dressing was superb!

We also had the best Indian meal any of us had in a long time when we got back to Ricks….bugger, getting sidetracked by food again. Really need to sort out the priorities lol

The audition with Frazer went really well. Nice chap, fun to be around, good attitude towards music and a really talented multi-instrumentalist…and a great cafe in his hometown was a plus. Anyway, this left us in a real quandary as the audition with Patrick Bullen the week previous had also been a huge success

Decisions decisions…we almost got phonelines rented so we could put to an X-factor style vote, but after quickly deciding that sucked, we thought “why not both?”

So that’s what we’re doing! 2 such talented multi-instrumentalists cant be turned down. There are obvious advantages, if I’m unavailable, one of them can cover my percussion…or if Richie is sick, the bass can be covered – and we still have a great guitarist! Perfect!!!

So, that’s the line-up decided, now to get some rehearsals sorted and get us gig ready

Anyway, back to that curry…..

My name is Stoo Nicol, I am a different person now than I was a decade ago and it does get better.

I can’t talk to you much about bullies, as I have little experience with them but what I can tell you about is struggling with yourself. In a way bullying yourself, about something you have no choice over, something ingrained; your sexuality.

A decade ago I was a very angry person, angry at life, angry at myself and angry at anything that was in no way responsible for my sexuality. I hated who I was. From a very young age I knew I was gay, perhaps before I even knew what being gay was. I remember as a primary school child having a crush on a classmate, he doesn’t know and I still see him from time to time, I always smile.

As I grew up I realised what being gay was, it was the thing people hated, feared and it was the thing they joked about. Poof this, faggot that or that is gay and this is gay. It was a very confusing time for me. I am from a line of Nicol males that are all men’s men, steel workers, foremen, tradesmen and here I am from an early age trying to live up to that image. Trying to hide what is going on inside and not only hide it, fight it.

I didn’t want to be gay, being gay meant being less of a man than the male role models in my life and I couldn’t have that. I couldn’t let my family down like that. I guess that fear of letting my family down is what led to me being so angry and frustrated. It was a horrible period of my life where I didn’t have the best relationship with my father. He is and was then someone who I idolised but still pushed away lest he find out about my sexuality. We argued constantly, I pushed against anything he said or did and it must have been a truly trying time for him; more than that it must have been a really confusing and heartbreaking period for him. A period I regret to this day.

I had never felt so low. I had also never felt so alone; there was no one I thought I could have talked to about it. How could my dad understand? How could my mother? My friends? It was a very lonely place I was in and I feared for where it would take me. I know that some people have very real struggles with their sexuality in that they don’t know whether they are gay, bi or straight. It wasn’t the case for me, I knew I was gay. There are however people you can talk to, places you can go to find advice you are not alone, there are many more of us out there who have been where you are now.

It wasn’t until I had left school that things started to change for me, I had a job, I met someone and I began my first relationship, I had explored a little before but had never felt like I did then. I kept it very quiet because for me it was not only the most liberating time of my life but the most terrifying. Every weekend I would jump into my car and I would travel to 83 miles to meet my boyfriend. I was young and the distance didn’t matter but I guess for my two closest friends Roger and Mark it was odd that I was spending so much time away at weekends all of a sudden.

I recall a conversation I had with Roger, after I “came out”, who I’ve known since I was 4, we met at the bus stop on the first day of primary school. He told me that they had begun to wonder if I was asexual as I never joined in their conversations about Angelina Jolie or whoever was hot at the time. Then they had both began to grow suspicious, if I was off meeting a girl of a weekend then surely I’d have been proud. It would have been a male knuckle tapping moment for sure. The idea of me being gay was quickly dismissed but the seed of suspicion had been planted.

It wasn’t Roger or Mark I came out to first however, it was my mum. I love my mum dearly and she knows me well, my moods, my emotions and one night she knew something was wrong. I’d had an argument with my boyfriend of the time and I was upset; though presenting a brave face. It was one of the most awkward conversations of my life, so I’ll recount it now.

“What’s wrong son?” My mum had asked, trying to make eye contact with me but I was having none of it.

“Nothing.” I had responded.

“I know there is something wrong… Is it a girl?”

“No…” She must have read the fear in my face as I had answered because she remained quiet for a good few seconds after that. Then she looked at me again and said.

“Is it a boy?” I think I nodded and she continued, “Are you gay?” I nodded again and she began to cry. I felt like my whole world had just caved in, there was no sense of relief or freedom. We didn’t discuss it she just told me that she would tell my dad, it would be better that way and I went upstairs to my room. When my dad returned from work that evening I heard him come in, happy to be home and I cringed. I knew what news awaited him and I just wanted to run away. I heard them chatting and then silence. I went to bed that night without speaking to my dad and my heart was breaking.

The next day my dad came to me, sat down beside me and apologised for not coming to speak with me sooner. He had been in shock and it had taken a while for it to sink in. All the usual questions of what did I do wrong and why didn’t I see running through his head till he accepted that it wasn’t about what anyone had done, it was what it was. He told me that night that he still loved me and that though it might take some time for him to get used to it that he was there for me. I didn’t feel alone any more.

My brother who was only young at the time, who I miss terribly since he died of sudden adult death syndrome, came to me that night also after speaking with my dad. He told me he didn’t care and that he loved me. I was so proud of all of them, even someone as young as my brother to accept me for who I was it was all I wanted.

Later that week I told my friend Roger, who couldn’t have cared less, it didn’t change our relationship in the slightest; we were and still are the best of friends. Mark was perhaps the funniest reaction to my “coming out” he, like Roger, wasn’t worried about my sexuality instead he was more worried that now I was gay I wouldn’t like football anymore. A fear I could easily solve, I still loved it, though being a Motherwell fan, some would say I didn’t even know what football was.

Finally I could accept who I was. It was in that acceptance I also gained a lot of strength; I could no more change my feelings than a straight person could change theirs. In accepting me it got better and it has never stood in the way of me doing the things that I love: since 2007 I have been in a folk band that has toured the UK, I’ve played at music festivals, my band has an album, I’ve been in several good relationships and I love who I am.

There are always times in life where you will be low and times will be hard but it should not be because of your sexuality. If I could speak to young people struggling with their sexuality right now I would say this – Your sexuality is such a small part of who you really are, it doesn’t define you as a person though as my story tells sometimes you feel it does. Though it may seem like the darkest, loneliest most painful place you can imagine it does get better. You just have to accept yourself, you have to hold on to the fact that it will get better and you have to make it get better.

WOW what a weekend. We were invited down to the Merry Tom Folk Festival because our good friend Nobby of Nobby’s Brewery quite fancied some music in his real ale tent at the festival. So we thought why the hell not, it was a chance to see some cracking music and to play a few songs… plus a chance to see Mad Dog McRea who we had seen at Spratton Folk Festival a few years ago and who we have listened to on repeat… REPEATEDLY haha

Most of the band were already down there, Lew down canoodling with his girlfriend the lovely Susan, Alistair was down there rehearsing with his new band and Duffy was in France busking and would hook up with us there. So I set off on my lonesome, with the percussion rig and Blondie the dog, who was a hell of a better travel companion than the rest of the band. She did everything she was told, slept most of the way and only required water and a few biscuits. At this point I’d like to thank the lovely Ray and Liz beck who put me up for the weekend due to my on going bum wound issues lol (it’s actually a surgical wound on my tail bone… but bum wound sounds better/worse.) Their hospitality was magic, fresh pineapple juice, cooked breakfasts, hugs, chat, tea and a double bed… come on THAT is the life. Thank you guys you have my love.

What a great weekend of music it turned out to be big shouts to Rakish Paddy (awesome), Woodstock (cracking harmonies), the Fabulous Duffy Gibbons (we know them… they are rather tasty musos), Kismet Hardie (really loved them), Little Johnny England (really enjoyed their set) it was just such a good weekend of music. I passed someone in the campsite who said similar, “Man this is brilliant I was expecting a guy sitting in the middle of a field with a bear… on a stool… an acoustic guitar and two hippies…” haha classic.

Just before we went on stage I saw a familiar face outside the beer tent talking to Lew… I was sure it looked like someone from Mad Dog McRea, then I dismissed that as absurd. Turns out it was Damien Scarr Mad Dog’s bass player. He was having a nice chat with Lew, I got introduced then the bomb was dropped that he and the drummer Pete Chart were gonna nip in and listen to us playing as they had seen a youtube video of us covering Am I Drinking Enough. The words to the song immediately left my head. BUT I had a cunning plan involving post it notes. I always forget the 2nd phase of the song which starts some folk… something… “some folk do time”… I think so I wrote just that on a post it note and stuck it to the lyrics stand in front of me so I couldn’t forget.

It was really awesome to see the guys sitting there right at the front and to hear Damien, who has the best laugh ever a real deep belly laugh, every time Lew and I shared a joke with each other. We made it through the set, Lew was so hot he had to tip water over himself again to cool down… looked like he’d had a trouser accident but hey we must have played ok as the guys from Mad Dog wanted to swap their new album for our debut album Here We Stand (which by the way is now for sale for a £5 bargain) for one of their new album. The Whirling Dervish which can be bought here, it is brilliant. I think they got the better deal but they seemed happy. Was lovely to meet them even though I have to confess to being a tad star struck, it was just as odd for me to play their song to them as it was to play Martin Stephenson’s lilac tree with Sketchy to Martin, while he sat up front for that a few years back too. A real memory I will cherish forever.

Then after some more tea and music it was time to listen to Mad Dog McRea rock the place and rock the place they did. There were people dancing all over the place as they played old favorites, jigs about curly wurlys and then something happened that made my face split in half in the biggest smile I have ever smiled. Michael announced on stage “We are gonna play a wee song now for Cross the Border… they are out there somewhere, they cover our song am I Drinking Enough, think they play it better than us…” Think at this point me and Lew almost took off with sheer happiness. Was a real moment and I’d like to thank the guys for that. I don’t think I will stop smiling for quite some time.

Huge thanks to Mark, Liz, all the festival staff, security, the stall owners, the musicians, the fans and everyone involved in the festival for making it such a wonderful weekend. A special mention to the guys and girls of Sizzlers we handed in a cd to them as we recognized them from previous festivals and they sorted us all out with some of the tastiest burgers we have had.

Long live folk music like this.

Stoo x

Hi guys Stoo here,

I wanted to make this announcement personally tonight just to keep you all up to date with goings on.

It’s with great sadness that I announce the departure of two border crossers, in Alistair Bell and Yuuka Yamada. We had a wonderful trip with both musicians in Germany but unfortunately at the end of July we will part company with both these talented musicians. Obviously the whole band are very sad to be loosing such wonderful musicians but the departure of both has been amicable and we will remain firm friends with both.

Alistair will be moving to England over the next few weeks to continue down another path musically with a metal band in Nottingham, it is a fantastic opportunity for him which he could not refuse and we wish him well in his future endeavours. I hope our paths cross again at some point as I have really enjoyed playing music with him, as have the rest of the band. We will miss his pyjama wearing ways.

As for Yuuka what can we say about her that has not already been said, she is a truly wonderful person and an awesome musician but unfortunately at this point she doesn’t feel her musical path lies with the band, we have talked long and hard about this and it is important for us that be it a break or a permanent split from the band that we support Yuuka either way. So Yuuka, you leave with our love and adoration as has been the case since the first note you played with us.

Obviously for fans of the band this will be a time of uncertainty, where does the band go from here etc, so I’d like to address that by saying the music will continue. We will take some time out at the end of July, audition some new members and rebuild. We will return with renewed vigour and new music. Thank you for your support and I am sure you will join me in wishing both these wonderful people all the best in all they do.

As with Sketchy before them, Yuuka and Alistair have our love.

Stoo xx

Stuart Blance, a fine photographer and all round nice guy, offered to do a photoshoot for us at Kinnaird Church ruins.

Check out his site here http://www.stuartblancephotography.com/

One by one everyone arrived at Ricks and then we set off in 2 cars – Stoo’s and Alistairs. Stoo’s car seemed to be the rowdiest as it had me, Paddy and Richie as passengers.

Conversation ranged from why Stoo would need to put sheep on the edge of a cliff, to spotting clouds shaped like genitalia. Stoo also pointed out that he’d dated someone in nearly every town we passed – think there’s a word for such a person :-p lol

Upon arrival we all met Stuart Blance for the 1st time and the overwhelming initial reaction was someone who was laid back and a generally cool person – this was a very good thing, as many photographers would’ve probably gone insane over the next few hours as he got pics with half of us smiling, half of us dour, desperately trying to get us all doing one or the other! All while listening to jokes about Snow White and the 7 Dwarves that would’ve made sailors blush (started off from Stoo saying “I cant do happy” – make your own punchlines from there, coz I’m not repeating what was said)

Poor Yuuka had a shock when walking round the car to find Stoo changing into his kilt – I think she could’ve beat Usain Bolt in a sprint at that point!

Anyway, a video speaks a thousand words and we have 2 videos here – one of the journey up and one on the way back

We’ll be putting up the pictures as soon as we receive them, but for some sneak previews go to our facebook www.facebook.com/crossthebordermusic

Take care peeps x

The day began with the dawn chorus of me and Rick coughing our lungs up in unison

A few minor events in between and suddenly we were in the car with Stoo and Yuuka, heading off to pick up bass player Richie from the station before heading over to the mighty P00kahs for a run through of a few songs – this is where things started going wrong

As we followed the satnav, the final road didnt look much like one with a train station on it and, much to our surprise Stoo had cocked up, putting P00kahs address in first. No bother, rest of us got out, met Alistair and Duffy and waited while Stoo went to get Richie….and waited…..and waited….and waited…and – well, you get the picture!

Now, P00kahs road has bollards in the middle, splitting it in two. When the satnav had returned Stoo to the very same road he was on before, but the other half, he was mightily confused and he and Richie sat in despair wondering what to do – all the time opposite the house we were all in!!!

Words cannot describe

Eventually we were all in P00kahs house though, with about 30 minutes to spare and so we had a quick run through of Run (the Snow Patrol song) and a couple of others and set off on the 2.5 mile journey to Macsorleys that somehow took us on a journey of 5 miles (had Cross The Border been the Fellowship of the Ring, Saurons armies would’ve taken over middle earth and we’d still be getting beaten senseless by Orcs everyday)

Eventually we got there and had some mighty fine food (best burger I’ve had in a long time – and the fish n chips and the stovies both come highly recommended too) and then set about doing a sound check

Steph Macleod then went on and what can we say about this guy that hasn’t already been said? He took the audience on a rollercoaster ride through rocking blues and intimate personal numbers. Cant recommend you go to www.stephmacleod.com and check him out enough

Then came our turn and the realisation that Stoo is not the most nervous frontman in the world. We’d decided to open with Winter Sun and this meant only Alistair, Yuuka and Duffy were onstage – and only Alistair had a mic! Poor guy wasn’t expecting to be thrown in at the deep end, but the instrumental went really well. By the 3rd song all 7 of us were on stage, crammed into an area designed for roughly 1 midgets left foot. Thank God we’d all had a shower!!!

Richie, thoroughly embarrassed by our rousing version of happy birthday sung to him, went on to play a blinder as we went through the songs, the whole crowd singing along to Run, loving Sake Of The Blade and our other songs and building up to ending the night on Hey Ja (a classic Stefan Picard song) and though the crowd shouted for more, in the 2 short practise sessions we’d had we’d given them all we’d got

Thank you Macsorleys and the people inside – we had a hell of a night and hope to be back soon

Hi guys it’s been a hectic few months for us through which all of you have been fantastic, your support has been really appreciated as the band goes through some changes. Unfortunately our friend and guitarist Gary “Sketchy” Painting took the decision to step down from the band due to work and financial constraints. It was a hard decision for him to make and we wish him all the best for any future projects he does.

With the exit of Sketchy obviously we were left reeling a little, as Sketchy and I started the band together which as you can imagine had us worried about the future of the band in general. After a lot of discussion we decided that we had come too far as a band to stop now, there are many exciting things still to be done not least of all making a trip to Germany somewhere I have been desperate to play. Once we had decided we could not stop our thoughts turned to finding new members and immediately we began advertising for a guitarist.

Quite by accident we gained a new member to the band during a trip to Kirkmichael (Guitar Village) to our friend John Duffy’s we studio where he was recording parts for my solo album. In jest DJ Buddha said to John “Aye Cross the Border are looking for a guitarist… up for it John?” and to our complete surprise Duffy said… “Aye I’d be up for that.” It took a few moments of us being slack jawed before we took in he had said yes. Duffy is a fantastic musician and someone we’d admired for a long time, he plays both guitar, Bazouki and a range of other small and unusual instruments so he is one of the most versatile musos we know

Shortly after that I received an email back from guitarist Alistair Bell, a very talented lad who had studied guitar in  Musicians Institute in Hollywood, Los Angeles. After watching his videos it became apparent that his fingers could do things on guitar (sometimes 7 and 8 stringed guitars) that fingers shouldn’t be able to do. So we arranged to meet and what struck us immediately was how modest he was and even though he left a fair portion of Lew’s Spaghetti Bolognese on his plate (Blondie enjoyed it – Alistair = fussy bugger he he) he decided to come along to see us play at Nobles. Unfortunately I was the guitarist that night and after watching us play one of the worst gigs we ever had he obviously took pity on us and decided we definitely needed a guitarist and so we had another member on board.

As we were on a roll we had another discussion about a bass player, we have been without one since our friend Tim Brown left the band a few years ago. So we did but this time is wasn’t through an advert that we found our new bassist, it was again, through an innocent conversation between myself and my friend Richard Neville. We had been in a band a few years ago together when we were just starting out in music but it never really went anywhere and musically we went our separate ways while remaining friends. I happened to mention we were looking for a bassist and he said “Let me know if you need any help…” At first I thought he meant just as a stand in until we found a bassist because again he is a hugely talented and intuitive musician knowing when to strip his sound back and when to really go for it. It wasn’t until he said he was serious that we decided hell… we’d be stupid to say no.

Here is a wee video of our first rehearsal together, Alistair only learned this song roughly the night before and Richi had never seen it before… not bad for a first run through I think Can’t wait to get gigging with the guys and gal again. Roll on Germany!

Stoo xx

Immortal Rehearsal

As Stoo has already blogged a bit about his solo project, I thought it about time to update you all with mine

“Lew Bear – Bearly Legal” is progressing nicely and the guitar work is all finished, ready to do quick mixes to send off to a few special guest musicians while I sort out the vocals and percussion

The album is going to be a mix of originals, traditional and a couple of covers of good friends, with styles ranging between folk, country, comedy and a few other bits and pieces.

I’m getting really excited about this and, while I’m keeping my feet on the ground, am intrigued to see just what it can achieve.

Watch this space, coz within the next month sneak previews and more news should be coming regularly

Just a wee update on what is going on with the project right now, I have received permission from Martin Stephenson (front man of the Daintees) to record a version of his song Lilac Tree, which I will be recording with John Duffy. Also working on songs with Steph Macleod, Daniel Mostovoy, Thomas Cairney, Cross the Border, Chris Barrett, and many other fine muso’s. Exciting

I’ve also had some quotes back for CD production so I am now looking into ways of funding the production of those, so keep your fingers crossed.

Stoo x

Well I am home from the gig at the Frog and Fiddler in aid of Cardiac Risk in the Young (Cry) that Sketchy’s missus Sia arranged, was a really good night and got to catch up with old friends whilst listening to some great music.

Got to see The Rogue State Circus with their full line up, which was a first for me and have to say I really loved it, really swells the sound out and they were on top form. Had a great chat with Jon, the vocalist and rhythm guitarist outside the venue too just chatting about the different line ups, venues, song writing etc. Magic times, really enjoyed that.

Also the highlight of the night for me was seeing young band Tautas Roks playing a blinding closing set, they were absolutely out standing , really great to see such a young band playing the folky type music in such a fresh and energetic way. I was just blown away and they are nice guys to boot… might have to assassinate them in all fairness cause gonna be hard to compete with them :p. Seriously though check them out, cracking sound!

HOWEVER!!!!! The highlight of my trip was Liz Beck’s raspberry nipple creation! It was delightful seriously, it was a raspberry mouse, with cream on top and fresh raspberries in the cream, which made them look like nipples… to me at least hahaha it was served after some fine Indian food from Sia’s mum.

Thank you to everyone who came out in aid of cry, was great to catch up with you all, thought you might enjoy this picture! It’s another nipple one… this time a daffodil nipple…

Stoooooooooooooooooooooooooo x